"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent"
Eleanor Roosevelt
These are some 'self-help' ways so that you can begin your journey of building self-confidence.
1. Every person is proficient at something so, each day, identify a different thing you're good at and morning and evening, spend some time concentrating on it and saying out loud, "I'm good at ...". It doesn't have to be big - maybe something like baking a cake, supporting your friends, DIY, finding discounts, collecting stamps. At the end of each day add it to a list, observe as the list increases and be proud of this stuff.
2. Never fear failure! Successful people fail more often than the average person because they take more challenges, they're prepared to fail and so they LEARN from their downfalls - that's what they're for. Each disappointment is a step closer to achievement.
Think about a professional athlete that fails to win the race. Does s/he withdraw from athletics feeling lousy? I don't think so; they recognize the things they did right, identify what was wrong, find an easy method to make it happen, and rehearse right up until they improve.
3. At first when goal setting, only set goals you know you can achieve, rather than setting yourself up to fail. This helps your self-esteem. Later on you could begin to challenge yourself with much more ambitious goals.
4. Recognize that none succeeds at everything they do. The 'expert' skier may not be able to compose a poetry, the perfect cook might be unable to use a computer.
5. Even the most confident people have something they're not sure about. They're not perfect; don't create stress for yourself by believing you have to be.
6. Know that lacking in confidence is a frame of mind. In this state you grow to be a self-confessed victim which alters your behaviour. Other people don't see you as a failure until your behavior tells them you are.
7. Dramatic changes rarely happen. More often it's the small changes on a daily basis which matter. If you grow even a little daily, you'll be astonished at the end of a year how far you've come. So keep a diary/record of where you started so you can notice the differences at the end of the year. Ensure your daily routines and attitudes matter, and congratulate yourself on your achievements.
8. Don't be around individuals who make you feel negative about yourself. Their negative thoughts is THEIR problem and has nothing related to you! Often they put you down to make themselves feel better about their low self respect. Try to find people who lift you and appreciate you.
9. Don't try to make it happen on your own. Even if you could make some improvement it will be more speedily if you seek some support from a mentor or undertake some confidence coaching.
10. Stop being hard on yourself!
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